My Spark

Sep. 27th, 2014 12:10 am
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Sometimes, I feel like my own being is far too much for me to handle. My mind seems so deep and profound that I can hardly grasp it. I feel like I’m drowning in my emotions and suffocating on all these thoughts. I feel like I exist more than I should – more than everyone else does. Sometimes, everything just freezes and my mind goes “Woah. I’m alive. Holy shit.” I look around and see everyone going through the motions and, in that moment, I suddenly feel so alone. I’m surrounded by people but I feel so alone. I look into their eyes and it’s like there’s nothing there.
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I know the world can be a cold place and people can be so distant, so unpredictable, so unreliable. Suddenly, you seem to find yourself awake in a world of sleepwalkers. Your senses overwhelm you and, perhaps for the first time in your life, you realize you're alive. At first it's so exciting but, quite quickly, you begin to feel so lonely.
I remember staying up late as a child. I'd sneak out of bed and tiptoe to the living room where I would stand in silence and take inventory of my existence. It felt amazing! But then I would remember I was standing there in a cold room, all alone, while everyone else slept. That's what life can feel like to me - to us. A few of us are awake while the rest sleep and those few who are awake are rarely close by. But I've found you now and no distance can keep my mind from yours. I've been alone for so long, I forgot how wonderful it was to speak and be heard by listening ears and an honest heart. Suddenly all those sleepwalkers fade away into their own silence and all I see is you.
Don't get me wrong: this is quite terrifying. I'd grown to take comfort in my loneliness. I know myself so I know what to expect from myself. But you have a mind of your own and your thoughts are a mystery to me. So I tread this distance carefully, though my heart pushes my feet faster than my mind would prefer.
You see, I've been down this road a couple times before. But I walked the distance only to find one man talking in his sleep and the other the kind of monster that hides under your bed.
Don't be asleep like the others. Don't be a monster. Be real, be genuine, be true and I can promise you I'll be the same.
When you have those moments - and I know you do - when you find yourself surrounded by the loud silence of the sleeping world, I'll be the voice that reminds you you're not alone.
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S = Shane, M = Marcus, D = David, Me = me (obviously).

S: Does anybody realise that every time someone dies, God is aborting them because their final time has not yet come? Does anybody realise that the universe is the womb of God, and that the only thing left for the babies to do is to be reborn again? This has nothing to do with right, or wrong, it has to do with how things are, and how things happen. They have for an eternity.This is my stance on abortion. ‪#‎conservativelogic

S: That's kind of funny. Jesus said the same thing I just did. In order to be born again, you must die to the self. His words, not mine, and look what happened to Him lol

Me: Not a Christian, myself, but glad to hear you're pro-choice! :D

S: The funny thing is it's not about choosing, or discerning, as if some choices are good and others are evil. It is about doing what's right for both the self and others, and the funny thing is nothing you can do can harm or help others, because nothing you can do will do either to your own self. And to be a Christian simply means having a name, because we get the same word to christen from the word "christ" or annointed. And the Name of God as written in Hebrew, YHWY, translated into English means "I AM WHO AM" It means the self. So the God who spoke out of the burning bush was the Higher calling of humanity. It was the self saying come be me. Return to me. Be the Messiah. Be the Christ figure that you are. Be the leader that tells them that your glorious purpose has sent you to liberate humanity.

M: They are killing a living, heart beating, thumb sucking, baby... God is not okay with people destroying his creation!

Me: ^ You obviously don't care to think about what will happen to the child after it's born. Most unwanted children are neglected, abused, and/or raped. That is no life!
We are already over-running this planet - forcing every unwanted child to be born will only worsen our overpopulation. The entire Earth is God's creation and we are hurting it! There are more of us already than our planet can withstand! If it wasn't ok with God, he wouldn't let it happen.

S: The universe is God's creation, you me and everything in it. If you kill a baby, fine. You are accomplishing the will of God. If you let it live, you accomplish the will of God. Nothing you do will not accomplish the will of God, because it is God doing it. If a baby dies, so be it if a baby lives, so be it. Life is natural, and death is an illusion. When you kill, you release, and the only thing left for that which dies to do is to be reborn immediately. It is as if it had never died. Because God is life, and you cannot destroy life

D: So basically you can do whatever you want with no repercussions? That's a messed up way to live..

S: Or you can just live in peace. Your choice

Me: David, you can't live in peace when you believe everyone else must believe and act just like you do. That will never happen. We are all individuals with free will.

D: But you can't live in peace when you believe people can do whatever they want...

S: You can if you don't let what they do bother you

D: So you're saying you'd be able to live in peace knowing at any moment someone could just walk up and shoot you on a whim?

S: Yup. Because you cannot die. don't worry about a fact you cannot change

D: Say that again when someone's about to put a billet through your skull. ..

S: I won't. I will just die and be reborn. Like a lamb led to the slaughter

D: It seems to me that kind of thinking prevents people from living to the fullest

S: Or does it prevent people from dying to the fullest? Either way, I am at peace with my fate. Everyone dies at some point in their life

Me: David, you say that his kind of thinking prevents people from living life to the fullest? How? How does the lack of fear of death prevent you from living life to the fullest? It is the existence of the fear of death that prevents people from living life to the fullest. They never go sky diving or ride a motorcycle or roller coaster because of fear. It is lack of fear that leads to freedom.

Me: If you are a true Christian, you will know that the body is only a vessel. A soul can not die. The Bible itself says so. So all of you claiming it's murder obviously need to read up in your Bibles. I may not be a Christian but I was raised one. David, why would a Christian fear being shot when they know that their souls are safe? What happens to the body doesn't matter - it's the soul that matters. That's why so many Christians allowed themselves to be persecuted - because they didn't care what happened to their bodies. The body is impermanent and disposable. The soul is forever.

Me: As for people doing whatever they want, that's the whole point of FREE WILL. Are you questioning God's decision to give man free will? The Bible itself says not to question God, for it is a sin. It also says not to judge others, for it, too, is a sin. "Let he who hath not sinned cast the first stone."

M: Okay... you all are getting your thoughts and facts twisted. You believe since God created us that "anything" we do is devine and therefore God's will.
First off, If you have read anything in the new testament it clearly teaches to Love and Respect others, which since we are all created from the Holy one we are respecting him. You cannot due this when you kill others. That is not his will. It's even in the 10 commandments. So you cannot sit there and pick out pieces from the bible without using all of it!!
God did give us free will, but just because he gave us this gift doesn't mean we can do whatever. He gave us the gift of "choice" for a purpose. That we may choice his way, or else we would be all robots.

S: That purpose is to liberate humanity from its differences. You act as if God is not in control, as if there is a distinction. Your purpose is to eliminate that, to become as Christ. To stand up and shake off the chains of difference. And only on that day will there be no more fighting, no more tears, no more suffering. It is distinction and disagreement that causes all wars, when in reality, your purpose is to love your enemy as yourself, because they are your self. Otherwise you are at war with yourself. What you do not realise is that that is what heaven is. No need to disagree, and no need to love, because if you do not need something, you have it. If you disagree with humans, you do not possess them. And if you disagree with heaven, you do not have it, and are in need of it. All of it is disagreeing with God, man, and your self, and the problem is you're making distinctions, just as Adam and Eve did. Just as Lucifer did. Just as "Satan" which means the accuser or the adversary. does. All you are doing is accusing yourself

M: What you are acting like is that to love you must not care or "believe" what everyone else does is okay... This is not true. You can disagree with others and still have compassion. This is what Christ did with the whores, killers, and adulterous. I agree with you about all of us must become one. All be in union. But we cannot disregard what is right and just. There is a right and wrong in this world.

S: No, because unless you become them, you can NOT have empathy or compassion. In order to demonstrate this, God became one of us. God became a man, but what you don't realise is what he realised: that in order for an unstoppable force to meet an immovable, stiff necked people is to become them. To become an unstoppable locomotive. God is one with man already, and God becomes man all the time. Because of your logic and your talk of separation, you will never meet that unstoppable force, and become it. Not until your death. Don't tell me who Jesus is, because you would not recognize him if you saw him. Jesus is union, and union is liberty. When Jesus told the pharisees this, they called him a blasphemer, because he defied their logic

S: But I forgive you because you know not what you do. Why do you not forgive me, because you know not what I am doing?

Me: Too many people focus on the Bible instead of Christ himself. That is the pitfall of Christianity. Christians must remember that the Bible was written long after Christ died by men - men in power with agendas, nonetheless. The Bible was used to control people - that's why it contradicts itself so many times; the rules in the Bible constantly change because it was written by men with different beliefs and different agendas in different times.
Christ taught us to love each other equally and unconditionally, to never judge each other, to help each other, to never look down on someone or shun them - even if they believe differently than you. To give everything you can to those in need - NOT to a church. Unfortunately, that is the exact opposite of what many Christians do. Even here in this thread of comments, there is so much judgement and anger; so many accusations and so much belittling. That is not what God wanted and it is these very behaviors and attitudes that has lead the world into this war-obsessed being it is now. So much poverty because money is given to churches and politicians instead of the poor who are only judged by the churches themselves as being lost, lazy, sinning souls. So much war and suffering - most of which was all brought on by differences in religion and judgement. God does not work in mysterious ways - God's way is simple: love each other and the world around you. It is humans who are complicated - reading too much into everything and committing the very behaviors that lead to our own destruction.

S: Agreed except the thing is we can't destroy the self because we can't destroy God

S: My love for you, is the same as God's:unconditional. It also means that it is the most furious, most passionate love that humanity can ever afford to give. It burns like the fire of hell, but it is as gentle as the sun beating down on you on a cool, breezy spring day in a meadow in the wilderness. And as you know, the sun burns hotter than you could even imagine, yet it can be as gentle and peaceful as you can imagine. And that is like the God of the bible. Every time he got near, the earth would quake, and lightning would flash, and the people would cower in fear. But when He came as a man to teach us what he had been all along, we didn't recognize him. We thought he was only wind and fire and fury, which was the most confusing thing for the people around him. He spoke like a lion, but was as calm and gentle as a lamb. But this is why he was so shocking. Never before had people heard a man talk and act as he did. But this is what he taught that everyone can be

Me: There is no destroying the self. Every mistake we make is just a lesson learned. A child can not just transform into a responsible adult - it must grow and learn. Our souls are no different. We can not just snap our fingers and become enlightened and pure as God - we must make mistakes. We fall for a reason. It does not mean we are evil humans - it means we are functional humans. We are doing what God intended us to do; we were given free will so that we could make mistakes and learn from them in our own time. God loves us no matter what we do; love is our true nature. That's why very old people are so patient and loving; they weren't always that way but after decades of mistakes they learned that love is the true way. Violence and anger only lead to more suffering - both for ourselves and others. Though we can not immediately just free our minds from separation, we can open our minds to all of the information around us and speed up the process. When humans begin looking at things with curiosity and a desire to understand instead of with judgement, we learn so much faster and become that much closer to God.
myvoice: (Default)
I am a sculpture.
Every day of my life,
I feel my experiences
chipping away the grime
of biases
and opinions
and judgments
that drenched my being
since the day I was born.
Every day of my life,
I become purer
and wiser
and cleaner -
I become a greater person.
Every day of my life,
I learn
and I grow
and I fight
to be the best me that I can be.
I chisel away the rough edges
and smooth out the deep lines
cut into my soul
by cruel strangers
by lost friends
by mislead family
and I begin break free.
I'm starting to see,
through the cracks
and the dust
and unfinished ends
the true me peeking through.
I am a work in progress.

myvoice: (Default)
 Sometimes, I feel like I don't belong here. I see so much that others are so blind to. Not in the schizophrenic hallucinations and delusions sense, just patterns in society and, well, everything. I see patterns everywhere that so few others see and when I point them out, I am only given blank and confused stares in return. They don't understand - they can't. It's not within their capabilities. Even if they wanted to understand me - tried to understand me - they couldn't. Seeing so much - seeing so many faults and answers that sit within plan view to me yet out of sight to everyone else - hurts. It's driving me insane. It reminds me of Plato's Allegory of the Cave. I see the light but no matter how hard I try to explain it to those in the dark, they just can't comprehend it and they will never be able to see it. The only difference is I am now surrounded by these trapped people and, instead of being tied down, they're standing. They can move and escape, they just don't know it. They could leave this darkness behind but their minds just can't comprehend that. So they stand there around me - trapping me inside with them - as I gaze at the brilliant light and they stare mindlessly into the darkness. I feel so close to every being in this world yet they seem so distant from me. I feel their emotion and I feel their pain - I am aware of everyone and they seem aware of no one; no one but themselves.

I wish I could fly away - go to another world where everyone sees what I see and I am no longer surrounded by sheep.
No, I'm not saying I want to die - there's far too much I want to do with this miracle gift of life for that.
I just wish things were different.
But they're not.
I am Alice and I'm trapped in a messed up, modernized Wonderland.
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Unitarians rejected the Trinity doctrine articulated in the Nicene and Chalcedon Creeds in order to affirm the oneness of God. They also tended to support a more optimistic view of human nature than reflected in the Westminster Confession of Faith. Consistently, they appealed to scriptures as they questioned the classic tests of orthodoxy. “Later the Unitarian position was to be summarized in James Freeman Clarke’s “Affirmation of Faith”: “The fatherhood of God, the brotherhood of man, the leadership of Jesus, salvation by character, and the progress of mankind onward and upward forever”

That's what I'm talking about! Question things! Reject that which does not ring true in your soul. If you see b.s. then call b.s.! This is exactly what needs to continue happening now! I know people doubt the things they hear in church - if only they would stand up and question it! Come on, people! Speak out! Our ancestors did it and you can, too! I don't mean this for religion only, either. If there is something in the world that rings false in your soul then call it out!
If you believe without question, that is blind faith. To me, that is the most shameful type of faith.
If you have not questioned, that means you have not found answers and you have not considered any other beliefs.
If you have not considered any other beliefs or have no answers, how do you know your faith is true and right?
You don't.
Hey, maybe you were lucky enough to born into a region and family that preaches the perfect religion. Chances are, however, that that's just not the case.
In fact, how do any of us know that any of the religions on this planet are 100% correct?
We really don't.
The best thing, I believe, we can do is to learn about as many faiths and beliefs as we can, hold on to what rings true in our soul
and throw out all that our soul screams "false!"
I beg of you - even if you feel your religion is the right one, take the time to learn about other faiths. If anything, it will at least help you understand the millions of other people and perspectives around you and make it that much easier for you to make amazing friends in your lifetime.

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Today is an exceptionally sad day for the citizens of the United States - especially for the citizens of Boston, MA.
Today, two explosions were set off at the finish line of a Boston marathon, murdering 3 and injuring more than 140 innocent people.

CNN News Story:
www.cbsnews.com/8301-201_162-57579671/deadly-bombs-rock-boston-marathon/

In response, the Westboro Baptist Church announced their plans to picket the funerals of those innocent people who lost their lives, proclaiming the following...


Let me say this loud and clear:
No God - who created our universe and all of us so lovingly and delicately and perfectly - would ever destroy so many lives because they obtained the freedom to love and marry equally. Marriage is a creation of man - not of God. God does not care what licensing you have with a government - all God cares about is LOVE. God IS love. If you believe, for even a second, that a God who takes care of everything in existence would destroy a single life of its own creation for such shallow reason, you are no better than the individuals who set those bombs. I pray the Light finds a way to your heart and Enlightens your mind, for you are so lost and blind that you mistake the darkness surrounding you for light and the lies in your mind for truth.


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Jordyn Mart

February 2017

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